mixed feelings

Today, I went through all our baby clothes that aren't currently in use. Sorted out the 'donate' and 'yard sale' piles and moved them around our basement. Sigh. So bittersweet. Taking the sweet little outfits that our kids wore at 3, 6, 12, 18 months and sorting them into piles....it's just hard. Those pants, shirts, sweaters all carry a history with them. The newborn sized clothes received as gifts that fit the kids for about 15 minutes. A certain sleeper reminds me of walking Isaac around camp in the dark, praying he would sleep. A favourite pair of pants for church, paired with one of his beautiful sweaters. A blue sweater he wore all the time when Norah was a newborn, trying to remember just how small he was back then. The shirt he wore on his first day of preschool. A tiny pair of Mary Jane shoes on pre-walking baby feet, with a little blue dress. The dark pink dress worn to dad's ordination service. It's so funny how clothes can carry such emotional weight. I'm trying so hard not to be too sentimental about some of the stuff they wore.

It's so hard though. It's like letting some of their clothes go means letting some memories go too.