morning deliciousness

Hey, minds out of the gutter, I'm not talking about *that*. I am a lady, so won't be sharing those details. Today at least.

What I am talking about is the wonderful wakeup of a small bunch of kids climbing into bed to snuggle. Granted, one has already moved in during the night, but the arrival of the other two children is such a lovely moment. Well, provided it does happen closer to 8 am than 7 am. Closer to 7 is a touch less wonderful. Three small, snuggly bodies climbing in to snuggle close, whisper secrets and give hugs and kisses. You just can't beat that - especially if it happens at 8:45! I just can't think of a better way to start the day, while still maintaining this blog's G rating. ;)

it's like living with a pair of barbie dolls

the frequency at which these 2 little girls change clothes, pull on fancy princess dresses, take them off and put on backpacks and hats, then switch them for other dresses and scarves.

It's tiring to keep up with. But it's fun.

fluffy friday

I'm going to admit my fluffiness right now. this blog I'm reading, that is pure, silly, fluff. I can't look away. I just can't.

did I just say that?

Really, did I? I'm shocked. Stunned. This is not ME talking, surely.

what were the shocking words?

"maybe I should learn how to sew"

random, rambly post

I don't even know what to type right now. My brain has been on overdrive all morning, and it's all feeling mushy at the same time.

I'm thinking about how much I've changed over the past 7 or so years. How I'm different. How I like some of the changes, but not others. How there is less drama in my life, which is good, but also more guardedness. Like I'm holding parts of myself back, which isn't so good. Like I'm guarding myself against things. Yet, things sometimes just feel numb, which isn't good either.

I can think of a few triggers over the years: my parents splitting up, a couple of our moves, my car accident, the births of the kids - particularly Ruby's. Some physical changes/hurts, some emotional. But things that have contributed to changes in me. Mistakes I've made, hurts I've caused, sadness I've tried to keep hidden, it just bubbles and percolates. Things I wish I could change, words I'd say differently next time, opportunities missed, times I've held back and maybe shouldn't have. I've been a lousy friend, a weak daughter, a selfish sister, not the best me I could be. I don't even know how to begin to fix things, let alone fully recognize where things are broken. I feel unloved and unlovable. I don't know how to ask for help. I don't know...I just don't know...

sigh.

ever have a day where you just feel little and like your worries are just small and foolish? when my biggest complaint is my lettuce going 'off' before I used it, yet more snow falling outside my window, or my youngest un-rolling the toilet paper, I really should be counting my blessings. The small, monotonous complications of my life are so little, so....tiny and petty.

there is so much more that I could be dealing with. Storms could come and change everything. My kids could be fighting an illness, my marriage could be in a terrible state, I could have just been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor...there could be so much more. These things happen all the time, and yet people are able to stay strong in their faith, know where their strength comes from, from the God who is able to do more than we can ask or imagine.

I don't know if I could do that. Stay strong in the trials like that. I struggle with just getting through a good day.

big ol' whine

I'm tired of snotty noses, and kids who are the borderline of being sick

I'm frustrated with myself for falling 'off the wagon', ww-wise right now

I'm ticked that I planned to put barley in our lamb stew tonight, but I'm out of barley and don't feel like going to the store

I'm bored with town this week because it's Easter break, and all our regular stuff is not happening

I'm annoyed that it's too windy to enjoy being outside

I'm feeling the aftermath of too much cheap chocolate

I'm too lazy to do any house cleaning. good thing it's rather tidy

I just want the snow gone already. The stinkin' stuff has been on the ground since November 1st!

I wish our basement had bigger/more windows. It would be easier to be downstairs with the kids if it weren't quite so dark down there

I'm just feeling blah all over.

I think I need a big prod to get back on the wagon, get off my rear end and tidy up while my lamb stew simmers (without barley, but with potatoes). Anyone got a cattle prod?

Happy Easter!

May you and your family have a blessed day as we celebrate the resurrection of our Lord.

Check my kids blog for some adorable shots of them all dressed up for church.

have you seen this kidnap victim??

oh goodness...what a horrible story. Have you seen this victim of kidnapping? It was all over the radio this morning. Such a sad story.

www.savemrpeeps.com

please, whoever has the little guy, let him come home unharmed!

Road Trip!

woo hoo! a last minute decision, and we're all tagging along with Rob to the city tomorrow. I have a shopping list that I have been pondering, and now can shop for. yay!

the downside? the kids + the van for 5 hours. we will survive.

not this week

I've realized that I'm actually hitting a major milestone this month - 5 years as a stay at home mom. I've had thoughts running around my head as to how to blog out my feelings, reflections and ideas. But not this week.

The kids are all dealing with a head cold. They are sick enough to be staying inside, but healthy enough to be up out of bed...and making me crazy. Snot flows freely here, and I'm constantly chasing one or more child down to wipe their nose. I'm uttering phrases that 5 years ago wouldn't have even been a thought to me:
"toothpaste is not a snack food"
"keep your snot to yourself"
"ballerinas don't wear muddy rain boots for dancing in the house"
"please don't ask me how deep 3 meters is at the pool, it's taller than our living room ceiling"
"I am the alpha mommy, you will listen to me, couches are not for jumping"
"rolling in the bathtub is not an invitation to bite your sister's bum"
and
"please just go turn on the tv for a half hour, mommy is tired"

It's been a long week, and it's only Wednesday. It's also Holy Week, so the hubby is going to be busy busy for the next couple of days too. Thank God for prayer.